Outline · [ Standard ] · Linear+ Things Overheard at the Shop......., Read This for a Good Laugh !!!

After almost 7 years of having my shop inside a large Mini Mall/Flea Market I think I may have heard everything. Most of the things I have heard or been asked are pretty comical bordering on the sad or sometimes insane. I thought I would share a few quotes from this past weekend along with a few of my all time favorites. Read at your own risk. Everything below is 100% word for word what was said to me by "customers". Believe me, I couldn't make this stuff up.

3 Goofy Questions from this past weekend.....

#1 1/24/09 10:14 AM :
"Did you ever get any of those AFC hats in this year?"

Keep in mind that I have absolutely no athletic apparel in my shop anywhere at all.

#2 1/24/09 1:02 PM :
"Are you interested in buying any brand new Thomas the Train stuff?"

My response as I looked around my shop....."No."

#3 1/25/09 11:47 AM :
This was more of a statement than a question. A couple of passers by spent a good 10-15 minutes standing directly under my 3' "SPORTS CARDS" sign while staring at the photos hanging in my shop showing off my customers pack pulls. Then the lady spoke up and said........"He must sell ball cards or something."............

My all-time favorites:

A lady came into my shop a few months ago and asked me if I could tell her how much a particular card was worth. I said sure. She proceeded to pull out her wallet and remove a very badly beaten, battered, and torn.......1991 Topps Sammy Sosa card. I explained to her that the card was his second year card and even in mint condition would normally sell for .25 - .50.........her response........"I thought it might be worth more since he started playing football."

A gentlemen came in and asked me if I had any Peyton Manning Rookie Cards. I said sure and I proceeded to take them out of the display case and show them to him. I explained that they were all 25% off the sticker price. Then he asked a great question, "Do you have any of his rookie cards from when he played for the Cowboys?" I replied that Peyton Manning was the #1 pick in the 1998 NFL Draft for the Indianapolis Colts and had been with the Colts his entire career. "No, he started out with the Cowboys.", I was then told. I again replied that this was news to me and proceeded to offer big money for any officially licensed NFL card of Peyton Manning with the Dallas Cowboys. The man then broke my heart when he told me, "I thought it would be worth something so I have it in my bank deposit box locked away. It's not for sale." Luckily for me the education I received in this exchange was in fact free.

My all-time favorite story involved a guy that dropped in and studied my autographed photos for quite some time. He then approached me and said, "I thought Warren Spahn was dead." I said that he had indeed passed away a few years ago. He then asked, "How did you get his autograph then?" To which I replied, "I went to his funeral." The man didn't even flinch. His reply, "Oh, ok." He then just walked away.

I have seriously started to write this stuff down and I will be sharing some of the better ones in this thread each week. For the record, I was also asked, "Do you buy cards or just sell?" six times this past weekend. I wonder how do people think that I got all the cards in my shop? Lastly, the question that gets under my skin more than anything else......"Are those real autographs?" was asked of me 5 times this past weekend. People just cannot understand how you could possibly have an autograph of an athlete or celebrity if you didn't meet that person and get the item signed yourself.

The moral of the story is to look both ways when you cross the street........these people are actually allowed to drive motor vehicles.

My all-time favorite story involved a guy that dropped in and studied my autographed photos for quite some time. He then approached me and said, "I thought Warren Spahn was dead." I said that he had indeed passed away a few years ago. He then asked, "How did you get his autograph then?" To which I replied, "I went to his funeral." The man didn't even flinch. His reply, "Oh, ok." He then just walked away. 

THAT IS COMEDY!

haha those are funny stories!

I also have the Peyton Manning Cowboys rookie card...how much you have for it?

Lol at the Sosa card!

haha!!

I work in a store where we have a lot of autograph memorabilia as well as apparel and then have players in for signings and let me tell you I have some good stories too!!

they are a blast to rehash! man those were fun to read!

the freshest one in my recent memory was a guy who complained about having to pay tax on an item (and then different guy said he was 'tax-exempt' since he didn't live in Ohio).

that's some funny stuff!

(lmk about what we were talking about last night)

Great stories. Thanks for the giggles.

Classic stuff. Thanks for sharing.

That Spahn story is amazing. I am just wondering if he had a bunch of reminders written on his face backward so he could remember the stuff he had to do while he was brushing his teeth.

rofl.
loved the one about the manning cowboy card.

lol but seriosly ive had people ask me if my autos were real also lol

I am glad that you shared those stories Chad. Those are definitely classics. Although there is one that you didn't mention that I thought was pretty good. Remember the time when that guy asked if the autographed bats were real? After saying yes, he then replied " Can you use them"? That has got to be one of my all time favorites.

I am glad that you shared those stories Chad. Those are definitely classics. Although there is one that you didn't mention that I thought was pretty good. Remember the time when that guy asked if the autographed bats were real? After saying yes, he then replied " Can you use them"? That has got to be one of my all time favorites.

Yes! I told the guy he could do whatever he wanted to with them in the privacy of his own home. The other good story is the ladies that said their son was playing pee wee football and needed a helmet......do you see where this is going?........Yes, they inquired about the Dan Marino Dolphins Autographed Mini Helmet. When they saw the price they loudly exclaimed that they weren't paying that price for him to have a helmet to wear. I still wonder just how small the kids head was? Folks, you just can't fix stupid.

I love these! I can't wait to hear more, thanks for posting these.

Outstanding stuff!

On a similar note, I have a story of which I am the knucklehead involved.

One day my friends and I were playing ball in the yard when we knocked our last baseball into the overgrown empty lot next door.

After searching for like thirty minutes, we gave up and turned to our only remaining baseball: a commemorative ball signed by the 1983 "Winning Ugly" White Sox team!

I can tell you it wasn't an official ball, because it looked oval after about an hour of playing with it!

Looking back on it, I'm pretty sure the auto's weren't real, my dad was much too cheap to spend that kind of $$ on a ball

My favorite from back when i worked at sportscards etc in quincy..

Mike had gotten in some of those jersey shirts.. no numbers, names etc..

He had a tiger away jersey and some guy bought his wife in and said see hon.. Its an authentic Alan Trammell Jersey Im telling ya its worth a fortune and he only wants $19.00 for it!!

The wife still wouldnt shell out the money for it..

Is Sosa on an AFC or NFC team?

NFC, he is on the Chicago Bears you know!

Or would he be AFC with the cool Baltimore Ravens?

Is Sosa on an AFC or NFC team?

Is Sosa on an AFC or NFC team?

Does it matter??? Chad still hasn't gotten any of those AFC hats in, dangit...was hopin Sammy would sign mine. Guess I'll have to wait til next year.